Reciprocation

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Attraction, Dating, gaming, Getting Girls, How Do You Get A Girl, Influence, Pick-Up Artist, Psychology, PUA, Relationships, Seduction, Social Dynamics, Social Influence

The question “How Do You Get A Girl?” is the most commonly asked question during our boot camp events. One powerful concept that we teach is the method of reciprocation. Persuasion professionals use reciprocation to become more influential in social interactions. The universal norm of reciprocation is what obligates us to repay others for what we have received from them. It is what drives us to return the favor in social interactions.

Research has shown that people who receive a small unsolicited gift from a stranger are more likely to be compliant to requests.

How does the reciprocation theory apply to getting girls? Seeking the approval of a beautiful woman in a bar or nightclub can be a challenging task. Using reciprocation can increase your personal likability, build trust and demonstrate value. You don’t necessarily have to be liked to receive benefits from reciprocation, you just need to be observant and generous.

The idea is simple. Seek to help out others and they will feel a social obligation to support you at a future date.

President John F. Kennedy once famously said “Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country.” There is no better advice for people who are looking to become more influential.

Generally, people in the pick-up community advise men to avoid buying women drinks. Partly, because if you are approaching 10 – 15 women per night buying drinks can become quite costly. But, in certain situations I believe that the gesture can go a long way in demonstrating value. After buying a woman a drink or offering a sincere compliment, she will feel a social obligation to be compliant to other future requests.

Happy Hunting

How Do You Get A Girl

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Narcissistic vs. Humble

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Approach Strategy., Attraction, Confidence, Getting Girls, How Do You Get A Girl, Humble, Narcissistic, Persuasion, Pick-Up Artist, Pick-Up Strategy, Psychology, Seduction, Social Dymanics, Social Influence

Each day I try to help men answer the question: How Do You Get A Girl?  To help men better understand social dynamics with women.  Today I would like to discuss two different styles of game that pick-up artists use.

 Narcissistic – Some men like to prepare themselves mentally in a narcissistic manner.  They have these mental cheerleaders in their brain pumping them up telling them “You’re the shit!  You’re sexy as hell! Every woman in the club wants a piece of your ass!”  and then they go out and open sets and work their game.  Narcissists generally get super discouraged when they experience failure.  They throw fits like celebrity divas.

Humble – Then other successful pick-up artists use a more humble approach.  They realize their game isn’t perfect and they understand their game is constantly evolving. They focus on delivering value in social interactions.  They focus on building friendships and let the world come to them.  Humble people are calm yet confident. I like to draw the comparison to James Bond.  He is calm, cool and collected.  He speaks slowly with extreme confidence.

I don’t encourage narcissistic behavior.  I promote a humble yet confident style of game.  In order to maximize success with women you have to focus on delivering value in your social interactions.  Once you become a master of value creation woman will automatically think you are a bad ass and want to hang out with you.  When your focus shifts from “Getting Ass” to “Delivering Value” you will begin to see results.

How do you deliver value?  You use approach strategy that is funny, interesting and genuine.  Focus on overcoming crippling self-obsession.

Happy Hunting

How Do You Get A GIrl

Group Judgment

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Attraction, Dating, Group Judgment, groupthink, How To Get A Girl, Influence, Pick-Up Artists, Psychology, PUA, Seduction, Social Dynamics, Social Influence, The Approach

Men are always asking “How To Get A Girl.”  Every time I post a blog I try to provide a nugget of knowledge that can be helpful in your pursuit of beautiful women.  The concept that I want to emphasize today is the idea of Group Judgment.

People are social by nature.  Extremely beautiful women are generally social butterflies and enjoy being in large social groups where they are showered with attention.  The attention is warm and comforting and causes feelings of acceptance.

Because beautiful women are extremely social.  They are usually found in large groups at bars and night clubs.  It is rare to find a beautiful woman sitting alone at the bar.

This group dynamic influences decisions and judgments.  Consequently, the factors that make you attractive in the eyes of a beautiful woman are influenced by social factors.  In order to get the girl you must win over her friends.

Studies show that when groups are cohesive and relatively insulated from influence of outsiders, group loyalty and pressures to conform can lead to what is called “groupthink.”  This was defined by psychologist Irving Janis and “refers to a deterioration of mental efficiency, reality testing, and moral judgment that results from in-group pressures.”  These pressures can be difficult to overcome when approaching women in groups.

Your strategy should be to approach the group and not the girl.  Focus on gaining the approval of a less attractive girl in the group and work your way up the food chain.   By becoming friends with the less attractive friend and showering her with attention you position yourself to approach your primary target.  In fact, by showering attention on the less attractive girl you will provoke feelings of jealously in your primary target.

Never underestimate the power that group judgment plays on individual decision making.

Happy Hunting

How To Get A Girl